Saturday, January 25, 2014

No Sympathy, Please

Sometimes, when I read some comments from my reader on my blog post or on my Facebook link post, those comments really surprise me. Occasionally some even pops in chat room to chat, saying my post makes them feel sad or angry with Bal Mandir for the way they treated us [badly]. They think life in Bal Mandir is very difficult. Really ? is that what I write my blog to make them feel sad for us, and be mad with the organisation which has such good motto in life ? Do I really write to earn sympathy from my readers ? If yes, then I must change the way I write then !

Conception of Bal Mandir is good from all aspect and the kind of work it does, can't be compared to other kind of social services. Bal Mandir is an organisation and can not perform anything on its own; without the help of team of management and staff. I do remember, once, reading a blogger Saurav Rana on THT Blog surf, who wrote that the children in Bal Mandir live at the mercy of their caretakers. Really ? How much he knows about how the system in Bal Mandir works, to say so ? That statement gives me a clear sense that, he has no idea how things moves in Bal Mandir. That statement also give us the glimpse of how people raised by family member thinks about the children who were raised in Bal Mandir or who are living there.

unlike small shelter home run single handedly by Pushpa Basnet or DilShova Shrestha; where they spend money from their wallet to help the needy ones, long before they got the donation to run their small samaritan work. But, the Bal Mandir is run by management team and staff and all of them are entirely on payroll basis. If some people in the management or even staff are corrupt which cause the pure intention of giving food environment to the children that blame should not go to the organization like Bal Mandir. Should not that person be separated from the good work Bal Mandir carries ? Had there not been organisation like Bal Mandir 1000 like me, would not have decent life today.

Some wholeheartedly sympathies us for not having parents or not having  a single loved ones around while we were growing up. That is strange ! Is that all a person who are raised by parents can think of; when they hear about our stories ? This really press me hard to think. Are they saying the life they lived is better than the life we lived ? Sorry to tell you, but this is enough to offends me! Do I really have to feel bad for that kind of thought.

Why people can't understand that our life is a boon from god to experience life to live all on our own and not by the lecture we hear from those with so much expectation saying I love you. Its really hard to live life with that kind of exception. Why people cant watch and learn from us that we are not dead because of devoid of love in our life or those who surrounded us saying I love you. We don't end on jail or in any kind of trouble as some phycologistes love to predict on their book and articles.

May be organisation like Bal Mandir is a reminder to those who strongly believe life without family is hell. If you are one of them who think so, then think again and I would like to request you to read my blog very carefully. Its written not with the intention to churn tears from you. As for me its life, and; life comes in different package. Why do I have to have, the same life that of the other persons, I keep meeting in life ?  Why on earth they think their life is better than my life in Bal Mandir ? What makes them think that ?

Does that mean that their world is so limited in so many aspect or they live in really small world to know the bigger aspect of everyone's life ? Why do I want parents for me who just died before I even know about them and even recognize one of them ? everyone has a different life and this is my life.

As for me what is really good about being raised in Bal Mandir is that having loads and loads of friends to play with, as well as having bigger playground to play, bigger rooms to sleep and imported clothes to wear. Oh, yes I really have to grow old to know that all that was donations and second hand ! But then, does that really made any difference for us to feel good about the dress we wore ? If it was donation and second hand then why the royals, people in management, staff and even children used to steal it ? Apart from the careless and carefree teenagers who stole it were the others in the above lines were jealous that we got a chance to wear better dress than their own child ?

They were jealous of what ? Was that the way, those corrupt people, trying to say how come we can have all the facilities, when they could not provide such facilities to their own child and sometimes better food, training, shelters and clothes etc. for us ?  

But the question persist, why people presumes everyone's life has to be the same ?

I am okay, if I don't have a relative who is about to die, with whom I am emotionally attached for so many years. I don't have to lose anyone with every year to this or that disease. I don't have to see someone dying with whom I am so close with. I feel good I have not seen anyone who died in front of my eyes in all these years. These are the perks I cherish most for not having whole bunch of relatives surrounding me including parents. Who knows I also  would fear from death, if I see it so closely all the time; and every year. Besides, I get a chance to live my life my way, not the right way and for this liberty nothing seems to be too big loss to bear. 

Sometimes all you need to do is understand our situation without comparing it to anyone. No bodies life is perfect and we all have our set of problems in life. Its justs that, our problems are different in so many ways.



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