No eyes for Painting

When I was a school girl, bunking classes was not much of the option, as they used to lock the gate to stop us within the gate of school or say inside the Bal Mandir premises. But when I look back its strikes me now, that Bal Mandir itself was such a huge place which covers big areas, that we need not get out of the premises, unless we have to.

As for bunking classes, when we were in about sixth or seventh standard, the art exhibition at the NAFA art gallery gave us the perfect way out from bunking those boring classes after day time snacks. As far as I can remember, NAFA art gallery hardly used to be out of exhibition. Those exhibitions used to gather the good crowd of people from outside, in the Bal Mandir. Perhaps, it was the only art exhibition in those days to give the podium to all the artist to be seen in the bigger market and also meet the potential buyers. Some of of those art exhibitions also used to get the openings from the Royals, which made it news also meaning more crowd flocked in.

So visiting those art exhibitions in big hall, corridor like long ones provided much needed escape from those regular classes. Its not that, I was very fond of paintings and had eyes for it. In fact I never had eyes for paintings or art until, I saw paintings by Manish Lal Shrestha.

Some times, NAFA art gallery used to exhibit, rows and rows of paintings by various artist at the same time, which used to keep busy even a child like me, who had least interest in anything but paintings. I did not even understood the meaning of those paintings, yet I used to take a stroll of those long corridor like, hall with hundreds of paintings for exhibition.

Its very strange that I used to take a stroll, regularly almost all the painting exhibitions. Yet; never understood and never ever gained a slightest interest in those painting, never tried to understand. And those abstract paintings, which made no sense to me, not yet. I have to borrow the words from Satish Shah, an Indian Comedian, who says on his famous series Sharabhai v/s Sharabhai for the abstract art “oh ! those painting you can hang on the wall from any side and yet people won’t even notice which side is up or down.” I so love this line about the abstract art and could not agree with him more on this.

I do remember spending times in front of nude pictures and giggle, but did not have a brain to think, who could have posed for the artist ? Did not even wonder, the question never crossed in my mind or any of my friend. Just stay in front of it and giggle looking at and pointing some private parts of the art. We must have passed some nasty comments, in front of the artist, without even knowing who he was.

Its really strange that those easy excess, to all painting exhibitions, never missed, yet; had no interest in it, and never ever grown any interest in it also. Even today when I visit banks specially Nepal Investment Bank, I do stop by in front of paintings and do spend some time in front of it that others, but my favorite is paintings by Manish Lal Shrestha. I like those big paintings on the bank’s wall, not in my room.

Oh yes ! when I lay my eyes on the his paintings, bright color blending captures my attentions so quickly and at the same time it sends my mind in deep tranquility and still mode despite its vibrant color selection by the artist. I have seen paintings by him abstract art only. That bell, which is his signature mark on most of his paintings, if not for all; some what seem to be sending the sign to remain calm my pressure and all the nerves in my neuron system, pulling all the things at once to calm me down. His art works wonder on me and my mind. It seem to be working on me on my all kind of moods. I never ever had eyes for painting but his work is, a pure exception.

When I look back and remember, all those painting exhibitions, I understand now that we have to see some things, throw our minds eyes, not just the eyes that meet it; specially when it is some thing, like paintings which is a creative work.

My all time favorite food

Sel falls on, the must have food list, for any foreigners, especially expats, who wants to know Nepal throw its foods. Sel is a festival food, mainly this food is associated with Tihar, but now a days anyone can buy it from Bhatbhateni Super Markets any time, where it moves pretty fast, yet; that is also not as good as to make me forget, which I had in my childhood making it my all time favorite food. I have tasted all kinds of Sel, until now, but it only reminds me of how good they used to make it and we devoured it without even thinking how hard it was to make.

If I have a slightest doubt about the full contribution of Kedar Shrestha, the housemother during Dashain who help made delicacies wow ! and picture perfect, then there should be no doubt for her contributions to make Sel perfect one, during Tihar. Its not that there was not other dishes like Malpuwa and Puri but Sel really stood tall in front of other roties served during Tihar.

It could be, perhaps that in due course of time, I had Puri and Malpuwa, which were as better or at times a lot better than the one which I had in Bal Mandir, but I have not tasted not yet the kind of Sel; which they used to make in Bal Mandir. Until now I must have tasted close to hundred different kinds of Sel and from different houses. None of it come close to the kind of Sel, we had during my stay in Bal Mandir, not even remotely close.

Though ingredients to make it seems pretty simple and not much expensive also. All one needs is a bit rough rice flour, sugar, good quality fat and ample of it for deep fry and that's all. But not every one can make is as good as the ladies who made it, when I was young. Perhaps its the process and experience that is a must to make good Sel, than the ingredients itself.

Its one of my all time favorite food also, yet this is perhaps one of the things which I like but I don't know how to make it.

The sel, used to be very big, than they make it in normal families, which I find very lean and thin and pitiable looking, look of it makes me even more hungry for the sel which i grew up eating. They used to plan and make, two per plate for the main festival, so by default they have to make it big. They used to make enough for Tihar and after that they used to use the same for a day times snacks also, for a couple of days. Even after having it for couple of days, it only teased my taste bud for the whole year and the next year, it was the same story. It used to finish, without fully satisfying my desire to have more. I think its good, if I had it, up to my throat then; it would have never stayed on the tip of my tongue and memory until now.

When I look back, it really makes me wonder how could they maintained the same taste, color and the crust with its crunchiness in it, to stay in my tongue for long after, I leave my childhood behind.

One thing, which I remember is, boys and the wood chopper used to chop woods in small sizes and then let it dry under the sunny October sun for two - three weeks. Then for a week or so it used to stay behind the huge fire of big clay oven, where they used to cook our meal for twice a day, to dry it properly. Then it used to make its way to the first floor kitchen, on the day of Laxmi Puja. This kitchen was used as a room of two nannies as well as it also served as children's dress storeroom, for rest of the year but on this day, it is used as a kitchen, as it had the chimney to let all the smokes out of the rooms.

There all experienced ladies used to make Sel, Puri, Malpuwa during Tihar, which is the second biggest festival of our country. There on that room Housemother, Kedar Shrestha used to inspect every details of it, and order as per the need, to nannies who used to make it under her supervision. She was the perfectionist, so she paid attention to every small details. Shova Didi, Chandra Didi, and Jamuna Didis names comes instantly, in my mind, when the word Sel is mentioned.

The room, which is used to make Tihar delicacies, was small, enough only to cook therefore those roties needed to be stored in other room which was bigger. They used to store it in our study room, which remained vacant during the festival time. Many boys and girls used to light that big pan without feeling guilty, which was sent to store. Because just like Mo: Mo: Sel is also, the kind of food, which taste best, if you have it, while its still hot / warm. Its not that cold Sel is not good but to take the real taste of Sel one must have it hot.

They say that, God is in the details, so no wonder with her Sharp supervision and the hard work and experience of those nannies; the Sel used to be so perfect; its so hard to forget even today.

Inferiority complex

If a person is deadly allergic to a particular food no one needs to kill that person. He only has to be given secretly that food which he is allergic and then the work is done. That particular food can be very normal to any other but the same food can kill the one who is allergic to that particular food. Just like that if a person is suffering from inferior complex no one needs to make him/her feel, what he feels. A small gesture, a hint or a sign language is enough to make one feel insignificant.

“Where is Nepal ?” is so simple question, but to one Nepali who felt so perplexed when asked by his colleague in Canada.

More he tried, more question popped up and he did tried his best to quench the curiosity but all in vain. for more on this see the link

My question to the writer of the article was, what can you do if their knowledge about our country is poor ? Just because we know all about the big country that is not sure fire that they too will keep a good track about small country like Nepal.

Many know that George Bush, was clueless about London, when he was elected president of US. After the news evolved most of the dailies in London [UK], had ran ads on their subsequent papers, showing London in the European maps and some even read like this, “we are here Mr. president.”

Its been a little more than a couple of months or so when a news made its round in internet that Justin Bieber does not know the meaning of German.

I am dead sure that the Germans give it a damn about it, that Justin’s general knowledge is very poor. He may be a Teen sensation and loved by the whole world but Germany is big nations in itself to pay much attention to the news and to be bothered by this kind of ignorance from Justin Bieber. But because we are from small nations like Nepal so when people from big nation asks us, “where is your country ?” and “we have never heard about it”, then it gets our deep subconscious mind and reminds us that how small and insignificant we are. we try to connect that unknown and small to our own identity, which we have been trying to make some what big and significant enough [in our personal life].

Only thing that got me thinking, is the person who wrote the write up, is a Nepali student of Ph.D, who is studying in Canada. He is also working there.

He reminds me of those, who were so infuriated, when they watched on TV, twelve Nepali were first kidnapped and then gun downed on video by some Iraqi terrorist [Islamics extremist] in Iraq on September 2004. Nepal was burning on every corner of the city following that killings. what is the connection between those who were killed by an Islam extremist gang in Iraq and properties worth millions burning here in Kathmandu ? What is the connection ?

What kind of mindset and inferiority complex it is ? Where is the proper reasoning ? Why a Ph. D student from Nepal, in foreign soil is not thinking any different; than the people on street of Kathmandu ? Is this because he is from Kathmandu. Thank God he did not acted like one of them. It just that it did not escape from my mind easily after reading it, instead it send me into deep thinking.

And I thought in my big part of life, this is my birth right as an orphan and the one who have spent time in orphanage !

Mother - the other side of her

Mukunda Tamang, was like any other boys; while growing up in Bal Mandir. During his stay in Bal Mandir, he thought that like others, he too was an orphan. Once after turning in the age of sixteen, he too was sent in Nepal Army; like all the teenager, just like the other boys from Bal Mandir. Army’s job was regarded as good and secure job then. One need not have to be more educated and yet they get a job, which not only paid decently; also provided them good shelter too. On top of that, one is not required to be very good in study.

During this time, in his army post, he was shifted to many barracks, made more friends than he can even remember in due course of time. Some good and some lasted long and some did not lasted long. During one of those shift, in a barrack, he met Mukul Tamang, who was younger than him and soon they became fast friends and as time went by then became more than friends. They were like brothers. Both of them looked alike and they also shared the same caste Tamang to create more bond between them. Like they say, they were like bothers, so Mukul Tamang, once invited Mukunda Tamang, to visit his home in village.

One fine day, they headed to visit Mukul’s home. .These two have entered the village and the home as a good friend but they faced a new truth in that home. As the days passed by in his village; it became clear that Mukuls’ mother was the mother of Mukunda. This new news which surfaced on the air, did not please Mukunda Tamang, instead it disturbed him so much. It was said that, when the mother bowed her head on her long lost sons’ feet asking for forgiveness, in front of ‘Pancha’ of the village. What happened next, shocked the villagers, because boiled in anger and emotion Mukunda Dai, boot kicked his mother on her bowed head, in front of villagers.

I am not in touch with Mukunda Dai for about close to thitry years now, like so many others also who are in touch with me to get the clear picture of this story. Besides what they do in western county, digging names in Google also does not help much to get more information, about his where abouts; so I have only half story, which I hate. But when I try to understand, why he did ? the way he did ? I can only guess, although I may be miles apart ; from his way of thinking to this situation.

My guess is the truth that his younger brother was with her mother from the very beginning and he was not even aware of her existence; was some thing very hard to swallow and too much for him to take it easily and forgive her, even if she kept her head on his feet after all these years. It would not be too much to say that normal and natural sibling rivalry did play a huge role here in his reation. Here are two brothers who had two stark different life in their childhood. Surprisingly they both landed in the same workplace. who came on this earth from the same womb. The below question keeps coming in my mind :

• did he forgave his mother at the end ?
• did he ever visited again the village, which was his born place ?
• how their relationship changed [Mukunda & Mukul], after the news surfaced, that they actually were blood bothers.
• did he still remained friend with Mukul ?

It also can not be forgotten that, they were known to each other at the workplace so they must have been in touch. I don't think one of them could have left job, just because of this news. Yet, what happened next, I don't know; but love to know the remaining half of the story, because I hate half stories, which end almost nowhere. Above questions keep spinning in my head, every time this story reels in my head.

Here in our culture it is very strongly believed that fate is a lot powerful than our wish ? what is fate then ? why they say things are written long before we entered in this earth ? Is that the reason, they keep hammering in our head when some things goes wrong ? Is the word fate is an easy cover up word of our human weakness ? The last question sends me in deep ponder !

Manner Police

It was around 1:30 and we were having light meal. During day time meal, normally its bit haphazard seating plans to eat unlike the morning and evening meal for which we have to follow the strict rule about our seat. Therefore, we were scattered around the kitchen area and its veranda from both side of it to eat our light meal, for which we call Khaja. I am guessing, it must have been during winter seasons, to get the warmth of the winter sun, we must have gathered in the veranda on both sides of it to enjoy our light meal.

As we were engrossed on having khaja, Samjhana Didi, who was also having her Khaja with us, saw one girl siting on the pirka* while having her own meal, with her thigh wide open showing her undergarments. She snapped very rudely, “pull your frock, and hide your dirty kattu, I don't want to see it while I am having my meal”. She must have thought she was done for the time but then when she turned her side she went like double eeww, as one of the boys was about to eat his meal under the full runny nose. She had that thin patience and that seem to be testing the same. She snapped back again with more disgusted look on her face, “wipe your nose, are you going to eat it also ?” Then, she spoke to herself, “Oh my God ! its going to make me throw up”.

It could have been late seventies or may be early eighties; I was not grown properly to remember her in my clear mind. Still, I do remember some things about her : Samjhana Didi, was a very small stature girl. She could have been shorter than the normal height of Nepali women, even of that times standard and she could have been less then 40 Kg at the age of about her peak of teen age.

She had very sharp feature and equally sharp voice to match her feature, which sounded very mean and unpleasant; specially, when she saw those sights, just when she was about to take her first bite of meal.

“Wipe your nose !”, “clean your nose !”, “pull your skirt and hide that dirty Kattu** of yours !” were some the lines she must have been used most of her time in Bal Mandir; than any other words. Besides, if some body ate with a sound of slurp, that also tested her thin patience and she used to snap out loud, without missing her chance to say, “stop eating like that, don’t you know how to eat [properly] ?”

Housemother Kedar Sherestha, was another one who was the best manner police and had ice thin patience for manner-less people. But, it takes years to realize that those were the bitter pills to learn manners.

Samjhana and Meenu Didi used to hang out with this housemother and I do not remember any other girls who were that close with her than these two girls. She did mentor them during their S.L.C. exams. Samjhana Didi and Minu Didi was the first girls to appear on S.L.C. exam from the Bal Mandir back in eighties. They not only appeared, but also made it on the first attempt, which opened the wide door for whole bunch of us, in the following years. It was the eighties time and girls were still not regarded, to send school and then college and on top of that we were growing up in Bal Mandir.

Today, when I see people vehemently clearing their throat and nasal and then throwing it on the streets so loudly, without hesitating, I remember Samjhana Didi. But the big question is, why grown ups do that kind of sickening behavior ? I guess Samjhana Didi could not be in every homes, to tell them repeatedly, “stop doing this !”

Those are times, I remember Samjhana Didi and wish she is there in every home to tell them sternly, not do do this ! This also reminds of an old saying, some times you got to be rude to be good.

Note :

*small wooden slate like object, which is made to seat about 4 small children to have sepcially meal.

** undergarment